Sunday, February 19, 2006

Paternal Instinct?

Is there such a thing as paternal instinct? If there is, how does it differ from maternal instinct? Perhaps this story will illuminate.

This morning I'm biking east on Glenview Road about 8:30 a.m. in the cold (5F). As I go over the Edens Expressway, I see a black garbage bag in the middle of the opposite lane. Immediately, my thoughts turn to those stories about babies found in garbage bags in dumpsters. This seems to be a silly thought and I continue down the hill, but the thought won't go away. I turn around, ride back up the overpass, and stop.  At the very least, I will at least get this bag out of the traffic lane and make the world a slightly better place.

It's apparent when I pick it up that there's no baby inside, but I can't resist looking. Much to my surprise the bag is filled with -- used baby diapers! 

Was is the smell of the diapers that made me think of babies? This is unlikely. The bag was downwind, and sealed. In the extreme cold, the diapers didn't really smell much even after I opened up the bag.

I saw two other black garbage bags farther off the road, as if they had blown off. One was partly open and contained plastic bottles. So, these people were good people who separated their recyclables. The fact that they were either careless or intentionally dumped them on the side of the road notwithstanding, they did sort their trash so they aren't completely irresponsible. At least, not irresponsible enough to leave their baby by the side of the road. 

I didn't open the third bag, but it definitely didn't have a baby in it. I think it was tin cans.  I stacked the bags together where they weren't likely to get into more mischief and got back on the bike.

Paternal instinct? Maybe. But mine needs improvement if all it's finding is soiled diapers.

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